Falling down in Worship

Today I was
h e a r t b r o k e n
about Emma all over again. I think it was the culmination of three things:
Tomorrow we’re going to Annamé’s funeral in Bothaville.
She is the second daughter that her mommy lost to Fanconi’s Anaemia in 9 months.
Then I reposted a  FB post on 15 truths when your child is diagnosed with cancer.
That in itself brought back so many memories of the realities we faced.
And I re-read some of the posts on the WhatsApp group when Emma passed away, including:
“Emma has died”

Then He, Who was and is and always will be,
my Creator King,
the Lord of Lords and the King of Kings,
Abba Father,
the Beginning and the End,
let me hear in my mind several songs I’ve been listening to lately, especially
“Who am I” by Casting Crowns and “Creator King” by Don Moen:

“Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name,
Would care to feel my hurt?

Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me?

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow.
A wave tossed in the ocean.
A vapour in the wind.
Still You hear me when I’m calling.
Lord, You catch me when I’m falling.
And You’ve told me who I am.
I am Yours, I am Yours.”


“You who made the valleys and the skies
Displayed Your love on far horizons and before my eyes
You who lit the stars and set the dawn in time
Called them all by name and now You whisper mine
You’re my Creator King

You who made the darkness and the light
Sun and moon to watch the day and guard the night
The hand that stretched the Heavens like a canopy
Reaches down to cover and watch over me
You’re my Creator King

Who am I that You are mindful of me? 
Who am I that You set Your love on me?
You’re my Creator King”

He, Who is Holy, Eternal, All-knowing, All-powerful, Fair and Just,
loves me (really), redeemed me and calls me by name.
He covers me with His love and He calms the storm in me.

I can only bow down in worship.
Holy, Holy, Holy are You Lord God Almighty.